The ABC's of Clear Writing
by
Loyd L. Turner
Copyright 1954
You probably spend a great deal of time expressing yourself--or
trying to express yourself--on paper. Why not do a better job
of it by following a few down-to-earth principles--the ABC's of
clear writing?
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ENGINEERING SUCCESS depends on the communication of clearly
written technical information. Now, more than ever before,
clarity in our written reports is a decisive factor in the
success of our work.
THIS BOOKLET, reprinted from a Convair Fort Worth presentation
prepared by Loyd C. Turner, may assist you in writing your
reports. Some of the suggestions may help simplify and clarify
your writing.
IF reading this booklet makes you more aware of the need for
better, clearer, and simpler writing, it will have served its
purpose.
R.L. Bayless
Chief Engineer
Convair, a Division of
General Dynamics Corporation
San Diego
WRITING ........................................ for easy reading
There's no magic formula for good writing. In fact, getting
ideas from your head into the other fellow's head by means of
black marks on white paper is a downright difficult job.
It's a harder job than getting your message across by talking to
him. When you're talking, you can see what kind of impression
you're making. You can emphasize points by raising your voice or
pounding the table. You can smile, gesture, and so on to help
get your meaning across. And if there's still some doubt, your
listener can ask questions.
But when you're writing, you generally don't have a second
chance. For good or bad, the words are down on paper. And
you're stuck with them, regardless of whether your reader gives
them a meaning totally different from what you had in mind.
This booklet will help you get your meaning across in writing.
And in your writing at Convair, meaning is all-important. If
you write something that your readers don't understand, or
something they misunderstand, you have failed as a writer.
And what's worse, you have caused confusion and have wasted time
and effort. Not only your time and effort, but the time and
effort of everybody who tries to figure out what you had in mind.
This booklet assumes that you have a working knowledge of
informal everyday English. That's enough. This booklet has
little to say about grammar and its rules.
This booklet has lots to say about getting your meaning across,
which is more important than grammar. And it discusses the ABC's
of clear writing--the kind of writing that will help put your
meaning across to others.
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Our aim at Convair There are at least four
is to write material results of clear writing.
that is Your reader will
. well organized . read it faster
. easy to read . understand it better
. clear to the average reader . remember it longer
. enjoy it more
the abc's ...................................... of clear writing
- -
. . . here are the principles we're talking about
a think..then write
b let the reader in on it
c write to express..not to impress
d write like you talk
e keep sentences short
f use familiar words
g prefer the simple to the complex
h be concrete
i put action in your verbs
j appeal to your reader's interest
k revise and sharpen
think ................................................ then write
-a-
who
what
where
when
why
Clear writing is like an iceberg: one-ninth you see, eight-
ninths you don't. The part that gets on paper is small compared
to the part that goes on in your head.
Clear writing is the result of clear thinking.
If the ideas are confused in your head...if the points you want
to make are vague to you...they won't be any clearer just because
you put them down on paper.
To write clearly, you must do a lot of thinking beforehand.
You must figure out just what you want to say. And why
you're writing in the first place. And who your readers are.
Decide what's wheat and what's chaff-- and throw out the chaff.
Plan to stress the main idea so that your readers will be sure to
get it.
Organize the material in some logical way. According to time,
maybe. Start with what happened first, what happened next, and
so on. Or arrange the material according to importance, listing
the most important point first, the next most important second,
and so on. Or you may want to organize the material in straight
1-2-3 order. Any logical arrangement will do.
The pattern you can use most often is the who-what-where-when-why
order of a news story. State your main idea briefly at the
beginning. Then give the points and details supporting this
idea.
Once you have organized the material, you can then concentrate on
the job of saying what you have to say. You'll find that you
can write it briefly and clearly.
Like many other good things in the world, clear writing doesn't
just happen. You've got to plan it.
let ..........................................the reader in on it
-b-
Here's the kind of writing we've declared war on. Below is a
single sentence from something Convair published about a company
policy.
The president or any vice president acting jointly with
the secretary or any assistant secretary of the
corporation is authorized with full power of revocation
and substitution, to empower and vest designated
employees of this corporation with authority to execute
in the name and in behalf of this corporation
agreements, in forms previously approved by the general
counsel, with those employees who are involved in
intra- and inter-division transfers and with those
persons to be employed who will incur reimburseable
travel and moving expenses in relocating at the place
of employment, which agreements set forth the
conditions of such transfers and reimbursements.
Quickly now, who did what to whom?
Most of the writing we do at Convair is to inform. So it's
generally a good idea to tell the reader--at the beginning--what
it's all about. Suspense is important in some forms of writing,
but rarely if ever in ours. The "whodunit" writer aims to
mystify; we aim to inform.
The beginning of a piece of writing is the most important part.
So start punching right off. Come to the point quickly. Get the
reader into the midst of things. Start with something that
matters, such as your main idea. Or tell the reader something
that will make him sit up and take notice. Preferably something
that is of interest to him.
You'll find that if you pick out your main idea and state it
briefly at the beginning, you'll have little trouble staying on
the beam for the remainder of the memo or letter or what-have-
you.
And the reader will have less trouble following you if he has
some idea where you're going.
Don't start off in a roundabout fashion. Don't bore your reader
with a long-winded introduction. If you do, he's likely to quit
reading before he gets to the main idea.
write .................................to express--not to impress
-c-
Look at these two samples of writing. See how a few words,
identical in meaning, can give you a totally different picture of
the man who wrote them.
First, consider this:
"I am at present engaged in the sale of corn on
commission. It is not an avocation of a remunerative
description."
Got the picture of the man who wrote that? Okay.
Now suppose the man had expressed the same thought in these
words:
"I sell corn on commission. It doesn't pay."
You get a picture of quite a different person, don't you? The
first man is windy and pompous. The second is forceful and
direct.
They were different people, too. The first was Micawber, the
famed blowhard in Dickens' David Copperfield. The second was a
businessman who put Micawber's thought into clear writing.
Biggest fault of most writing at Convair is that the writer is
trying to impress someone. His secretary, maybe, or his
department head, or the division manager.
So the writer makes sure that he uses a lot of polysyllables.
And he writes long sentences and involved paragraphs. He's going
to prove that he can handle the king's English as well as the
next fellow. The result is sometimes full of sound and fury,
signifying nothing.
Somewhere he got the wild idea that this kind of writing makes
him appear intelligent.
But somewhere he lost the real idea: that he's writing to
inform his readers...to get facts from his head into their
heads.
When you're writing primarily to inform, you should use words
generally familiar to your readers and you should keep your
sentences reasonably short. Write to EXpress, not to IMpress.
The person who can express complex ideas simply is likely to go
further in the world than the person who writes gobbledygook.
write ..............................................like you talk
-d-
Many people tighten up when they begin writing or dictating.
They become stiff and unnatural and impersonal.
They choose pretentious words that they would never use in
talking--"subsequent to" instead of "after," "utilization"
instead of "use," "optimum" instead of best, and so on to
sickening infinity.
vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv
you talk like this: Why write like this?
If you need more Should the supply of stickers sent you
stickers, ask us prove to be insufficient to meet your
for them. requirements, application should be made
to this office for an additional quantity.
Here are the sample In reference to communications requested
memos you wanted for as samples for the clear-writing clinic,
the clear-writing the attached memoranda are herewith
clinic. submitted.
Designers now assume Present designs of windshields are
the public prefers predicated on the assumption that one-
one-piece piece windshields are preferred by the
windshields. general public.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
They shun personal pronouns like the plague. Ditto for
contractions (like "isn't" and "you'll"). They wouldn't think of
writing a fragmentary sentence to give emphasis or variety.
And their written sentences are twice as long as their spoken
sentences.
The result is not only dull reading--it's difficult reading.
They use plain words in talking, and they use personal pronouns,
contractions, and fragmentary sentences. But they don't use
these things when writing. Even when writing informal memos and
letters.
That's a pity. A conversational tone is one of the best avenues
to readable writing. It increases interest. It increases
understanding, too, because it forces the writer to be more
direct.
Don't lapse into a stuffy business jargon that has no relation to
the way business people talk face-to-face.
Try this. Next time you have to write something, get a mental
picture of the reader. Then talk to him on paper.
keep..............................................sentences short
-e-
English sentences are getting shorter and shorter. In the
seventeenth century, sentences averaged about 45 words. By the
nineteenth century, the average had shrunk to about 30 words.
Today, the average is less than 20 words.
That's the average for written material which reaches a large
audience--newspapers, magazines, best-sellers. These are written
in the kind of sentences people like to read. In fact, people
pay hard-earned money for the opportunity. Reader's Digest, for
instance, averages only 15 to 16 words per sentence. So does
Newsweek.
Unfortunately, the business world--Convair included--has not yet
whittled its sentence length down to size. It's still about a
century behind the times.
The logic of writing short sentences is obvious. The longer the
sentence, the more words. The more words, the more
relationships. The more relationships, the more effort for the
reader. The more effort for the reader, the more chance he will
misunderstand, and the sooner he will quit reading.
People don't like to read material made up of 40-word sentences,
even if they get it for free. Reading tends to become hard when
sentences average above 20 words.
So keep your sentences short. Sprinkle periods liberally over
what you're writing.
Keep the average length of your sentences below 20 words. With
20-word sentences, you can write on nearly any subject in this
world or the next.,
Note that we're talking about averages. There's nothing wrong
with a 40-word sentence, or even a 60-word sentence,
now and then. You'll need a long sentence occasionally for
variety. But balance these long sentences with some short ones
of five or ten words, to keep the average length below 20 words.,
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Whenever you can shorten a sentence, do. And one always can.
The best sentence? The shortest. -- Gustave Flaubert
There are few things in life as beautiful as a simple
sentence...or as rare.
use .............................................. familiar words
-f-
These days you don't get much chance to show off your vocabulary
treasures. Like your tuxedo, they have to stay at home most of
the time.
That's hard, but it's fair. Particularly for the reader.
If you have a big vocabulary full of sesquipedalian polysyllables
-- that's fine. It'll help you read. It'll help you learn.
It'll help you think. It'll even help you work crossword
puzzles.
But use it sparingly in your writing.
Why? Because when you want to communicate with somebody, you
have to use the words he has in his head.
If he doesn't understand some of the words you use, he's likely
to miss your meaning.
Bear this simple truth in mind. Unless he understands, you
have accomplished nothing.
Fortunately for all of us, the chance of striking awe by means of
beg words has about run out. The United States has passed the
yokel stage where it can be impressed by a flow of polysyllables.
When people are interested enough in the subject, they put on
their hip boots and try to wade through the long sentences and
highbrow words.
But the average person at Convair and elsewhere is only mildly
interested in what he is expected to read. If he finds the
first paragraph is made up of tortuous sentences and unfamiliar
words, that's all she wrote, as far as he is concerned. He
doesn't have the interest or the time to figure out what the
writer was trying to put across.
You won't lose your reader if you give him more short sentences
and fewer complex words.
There's no better way to clear, crisp writing style than short
sentences and short words.
So keep your mixture of polysyllables lean. Keep the percentage
of hard words (three or more syllables) under ten percent.
If you mix in more than one three-syllable word in ten, you're
taking chances. That's about the limit for easy reading.
prefer .................................the simple to the complex
-g-
Most complexity in written material is the fault of the writer.
It's not the fault of the reader. And certainly not the fault of
the subject.
If you want to write so that you can be easily understood,
prefer the simple to the complex. Prefer the simple word to
the complicated word. Prefer the simple sentence to the complex
sentence. Prefer the simple paragraph to the involved one.
The skeptic may say, "That's all right when you're dealing with
simple subjects. But you don't mean for this principle to apply
when you're writing about complicated subjects?"
Emphatically yes! That's when you need the principle more than
ever. Here's why.
A reader has only a limited amount of mental power. If he has to
use all this power in figuring out your words and their
relationships, he has none left to grasp the complicated thoughts
you're trying to express.
This point is not so philosophical as it may sound. The more you
think about it, the more you'll agree with it.
And once you agree with it, you'll prefer the simple words and
sentences when you write.
This doesn't mean that you should use simple words and sentences
and paragraphs all the time. The word prefer is a key one in
this principle of clear writing.
A steady diet of simple words and sentences would get mighty
monotonous to the reader. Vary the diet so that he won't get
bored. Variety is the spice of reading as well as of life.
Use simple, short sentences frequently, but not all the time.
Use familiar words when possible, but if a foot-and-a-half-long
word is really necessary, use it. Keep most paragraphs short,
but don't be afraid to toss in a fairly long one if logic demands
it.
Don't think for a moment that the principles of clear writing put
you in a strait jacket. You have all the freedom you'll ever
need. You can give free rein to your individual writing style.
And you should...for variety's sake.
be concrete .....................................................
-h-
The three laws of good writing are: (1) be concrete, (2) be
concrete, and (3) be concrete.
Use lots of concrete, specific words that stand for things you
and your reader can see, hear, taste, touch, and smell. If
possible, call a spade a spade.
Concrete nouns are good bait for catching readers and holding
them.
Shy away from abstract words which soar into the blue and stand
for things you can't pin down. It's hard to say just what
abstract words do mean. And they often mean different things to
different people. Take "democracy" and "indoctrination," for
example. You'd probably have a hard time finding three people
who agree on the exact meaning of these two common words.
Abstract words make your writing dull and foggy. The more of
them you use, the harder your writing is to understand.
Here's the difficulty. When you become familiar with an abstract
word, you generally forget that it may bring only a fuzzy or
misleading idea to the mind of your reader.
Consider these two sentences:
In industrial communities the chief motivation for the
purchase of curtains is practicality.
In factory towns housewives buy curtains that wash well.
The first sentence is abstract, hard for the reader to
understand. The second is concrete, easy to grasp.
Here's another example;
It is suggested that the voucher be rewritten with the
explanation that official business was performed on
December 10.
How vague can you get? Who suggests? Who should rewrite the
voucher? Who performed official business?
Be concrete. Be specific. Write it like this:
We suggest that you rewrite the voucher, explaining
that Joe Blow performed official business on December 10.
If you want to keep your writing clear and crisp and
understandable, load it with concrete nouns and verbs.
put action ........................................ in your verbs
-i-
Write most of your sentences like this: subject...verb...object.
The habit of trying first for this subject-verb-object
combination should be as automatic as pushing the starter button
before stepping on the gas.
Why? Because then you'll be using active verbs. And active
verbs are the kind that give snap and punch to your writing.
You'll also be writing like you talk. Odds are that you use
active verbs more in talking than in writing.
Active verbs are more natural, more direct, more forceful than
passive verbs. Increase the percentage of active verbs, and
watch your writing come to life.
Let's take a very simple example.
(1) The boy hit the ball. (active)
(2) The ball was hit by the boy. (passive)
(3) The hitting of the ball was done by the boy. (still
more passive)
The first version has the subject-verb-object combination. It
has an active verb. This is how you would normally speak this
thought.
The second version has a passive verb. The snap of action has
almost gone.
The third version is a completely backward arrangement. The
action has now disappeared. The verb force has become the
subject of the sentence.
Also, notice how much longer and indirect the second and third
versions have become.
In good writing--writing that sells--about one word out of ten is
a strong active verb.
One of the things you like about Time -- if you like it -- is
the strong-flavored active verbs cropping up everywhere. They
make for a lively style. The story marches along.
Much of the writing at Convair suffers from an overdose of
passive verbs. As a result, it's lifeless and uninteresting.
Some people are so infected with "passivitis" that they use
passive verbs to issue instructions, orders, and requests. This
is contrary to the laws of logic and the laws of grammar. We'll
not go into details, but normally you should use the second
person ("you") and an active verb to issue an order or
instruction.
For instance: "You must notify the personnel department of any
change in ;your address." Or more simply: "Notify the personnel
department of any change in your address.
This is the natural way to speak and write. Why violate both
logic and grammar to write the sentence with a passive verb?
Like this: "The personnel department will be notified by you of
any change in your address." Or worse: "It is requested that
the personnel department be notified of any change in your
address."
Why do people write like this? The main reason is that passive
verbs make it easy for them to pussyfoot, hedge, and generalize.
They don't have to commit themselves. They can leave out the
doer of the action.
For instance, instead of saying they believe something, or
Convair suggests something, they write "it is believed," or "it
is suggested," and so on.
Once in a great while you may have good reason for writing
something that's not too clear. Then use the impersonal, passive
way of writing. But when your purpose if clear communication,
use lots of active verbs, and write direct and to the point.
Ever hear the story of the plumber who wrote to the Bureau of
Standards that he had found hydrochloric acid good for cleaning
out clogged drains?
He got the following answer: "The efficacy of hydrochloric acid
is indisputable, but the corrosive residue is incompatible with
metallic permanence."
So the plumber wrote back that he was glad the Bureau agreed with
him.
The Bureau tried again: "We cannot assume responsibility for
the production of toxic residue with hydrochloric acid and suggest
use of alternative procedure."
The plumber again expressed his appreciation to the Bureau for
agreeing with him.
Finally, in desperation, the Bureau climbed down off its high
horse and wrote:
"Don't use hydrochloric acid. It'll eat hell out of your pipes."
appeal ................................ to your reader's interest
-j-
It's this basic attitude, this yearning for
concreteness, this lifelong itch to get down to facts,
cases, people, things, colors, sensations, sounds,
events, scenes, movement, dialogue, that makes a
professional writer what he is. He can't understand
other people who don't have that itch...When he hears
and sees the millions of high-flown generalities that
fill the world's air and cover the world's paper, he
wants to talk back, to ask for practical illustrations,
living examples, who-said-exactly-what-to-whom and how-
does-this-affect-Mrs.-McNulty-in-Hackensac-New-
Jersey...
The ordinary person never understands this. He thinks
the secret of writing is something entirely different.
He wants rules...he'll do the rest and supply the
material, the ideas to be expressed. Unfortunately
things don't work that way: to write well, you must
think differently; you must have the itch for
reality...
-- Rudolf Flesch
If writing interests a reader, it'll do a better job of informing
him or influencing him. So be sure to touch the reader's
interest.
You've already learned that he likes short sentences, concrete
nouns, and active verbs. He also likes an informal
conversational tone.
And he likes personal pronouns--"we," "I," "me," "you," "they."
These pronouns increase his interest because they help make
writing come alive. Personal pronouns show that the writer is
talking about people--not just about things and facts and ideas.
But the problem of appealing to your reader's interest is broader
than that. Stated simply, it's this: When you write something,
the reader -- not you -- is the all-important person.
Don't forget the reader for a minute. Write to him and for
him. Put yourself in his place.
This memo you're going to write -- what is there in it that's of
interest to him? Pick out that something and get it into the
memo early, perhaps in the opening sentence.
Unless your writing is at least mildly interesting to the
reader, and unless he can understand it, he isn't going to read
it.
revise .............................................. and sharpen
-k-
Nearly everything you read has been revised at least once. Most
successful writers go over their material and sharpen it up after
it's written.
So don't feel that revising your writing is something to be
ashamed of. Everybody does it.
Here's a sentence from a Convair memo.
In view of the nature of the above problem, and the
many and varied opinions of quality control, shop, and
contracts, as well as the magnitude of some of the
discrepancies that have existed in the past, it would
be highly appreciated if a basic procedure in the form
of a DSP could be initiated and released in the very
near future outlining the policy that should be followed
in making routine decisions wherein it is necessary to
rework discrepancies found to exist by the ferry crew
either prior to or after takeoff of an aircraft for
delivery.
Note how the sentence shrinks when you cut out the "fat" words
and come straight to the point. The reader will now get the
meaning right away.
We need a DSP immediately telling us how to handle
ferry crew squawks.
A good test for any kind of writing is to read it aloud. This
will help you spot words and sentences that should be changed or
thrown out.
When you write a first draft, you usually put down words and
sentences that seem very clear at the time. Later, upon reading
it closely, you'll no doubt find that you can make the meaning
clearer by changing some words and deleting others. You'll
probably discover that you can leave out phrases and sentences
and even paragraphs. Possibly you can improve what's left by
rearranging it.
Look for "fat" words that say nothing. Look for worn-out
phrases. Look for unnecessary sentences. Look for paragraphs
that don't carry their own weight. Cross out all of 'em. You'll
be amazed at the crisp sound of what's left.
This is your last chance to give the reader an even break.
So chop that long paragraph in two--the reader likes white space.
Underline important words and thoughts so the reader can't miss
them. Or highlight them by putting them into separate paragraphs.
If necessary, repeat your main point to make sure the reader gets
it.
Then ask yourself: Will the reader be able to understand this
without working at it? If not, then you're not through working
on it.
what's .......................................... your fog index?
-m-
Want a yardstick to measure how difficult your writing is to
read?
That's where the Fog Index comes in.
But before explaining how to find your Fog Index, let's get one
thing straight. The way to write clearly is to apply the
principles of clear writing. Then your Fog Index will take care
of itself.
There are several methods of measuring the readability of written
material. All are based on sentence length and word length.
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The short words are the best, and the old words the best of all.
-- Winston Churchill
Churchill can handle the English language about as well as
anybody. He knows there's some truth in the old saying: "Big
men use little words; little men use big words."
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
The Fog Index method developed by Robert Gunning is the simplest.
(The technique of Clear Writing, McGraw-Hill, 1952) And it has
one big advantage. It checks closely with school-grade levels of
reading difficulty. For instance, the average person with ten
years of schooling can read, with ease, material with a Fog Index
of 10 or less. A college graduate can read material with a Fog
Index of 16 or 17.
Here's how to find the Fog Index of written material. Take these
three simple steps:
(1) Figure out the average number of words per sentence. Use a
sample at least 100 words long. Divide the total number of
words by the number of sentences. This gives you the
average sentence length.
(2) Count the number of words of three syllables or more in the
sample. Don't count (a) words that are capitalized; (b)
combinations of short easy words -- like "bookkeeper" and
"butterfly;" (c) verbs that are made three syllables by "ed"
or "es" -- like "created" or "trespasses." Divide the
number of words of three syllables by the number of words in
the sample. This gives you the percentage of hard words.
(3) Add the two quotients above and multiply the total by .4
This gives you the fog Index.
how ........................................ to use the fog index
-n-
The Fog Index is no cure-all and is not supposed to be. But it
does give you a good idea of how difficult a piece of writing is
to read and understand.
And you can be sure that if what you have written has a Fog Index
of more than 12, it's above the easy-reading range. You're
writing on the college level of complexity. You're placing under
a handicap the ideas you're trying to express. And you're likely
to be either ignored or misunderstood.
Earlier in this booklet, we urged you to use short sentences
averaging 20 words or less. We also urged you to use short words
and to keep the mixture of polysyllables lean--10 percent or
less. These two factors--20-word sentences and 10 percent hard
words--total 30. Multiply this by .4, and you get a Fog Index of
12. That's the danger line of reading difficulty.
The Bible, for the most part, has a Fog Index of 6 or 7. Time
magazine measures about 10. Even the Atlantic Monthly has a Fog
Index of only 12. This booklet has a Fog Index of less than 8.
It stands to reason that if you are writing something for all
employees, or for all employees in a department, you should write
it with a Fog Index of 11 or less. Preferably less.
And bear this in mind, too. Just because a person has lots of
schooling and can understand written matter with a Fog Index of
17-plus, this doesn't mean he likes to read such stuff. He
doesn't like to stand on mental tiptoe and strain to get the
meaning. He would much rather read stuff written with a Fog
Index of 12, or 10, or 8. Wouldn't you?
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Learn the ABC's of clear writing. Practice what this booklet
preaches. Your writing will become simple, clear, direct, and
understandable.
You'll be writing for easy reading.
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Prepared by
Loyd L. Turner together with the
Illustrations Section of Service Engineering
Convair, Fort Worth
This Edition Published by
Engineering Service Publications
Convair, San Diego
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